Posted by: chlost | May 2, 2010

Miscellaneous musings

So much to think about lately.

The Arizona immigration law is so overwhelmingly wrong-headed that it boggles me completely.  The most recent news story about it quoted Arizonans talking about their support of it as a response to the drug crimes the state is dealing with on a daily basis, and which the rest of the country doesn’t understand.  What I don’t understand is how rounding up any suspiciously undocumented person walking along the street, working in a restaurant, sitting in a park, trimming a lawn, or working in a factory will decrease the drug crimes on the border.  Of course, the pesky little matter of the US Constitution is also a huge issue for me when considering this law.  In my mind, I picture my granddaughters asking me “What did you do to stop the bad things from happening to the illegal aliens, grandma?”, as we have asked the Germans about the pre-WW2 persecution of the Jews.  What am I going to do? 

Our lovely midwestern state now has a Republican-endorsed tea bagger as a gubernatorial candidate.  I have indirectly dealt with this man and can attest to his nastiness.  If he is elected governor, I truly fear for the future of our state.  It is a disturbing thought. It would be just another reason to move from here.

The major life decision is still in process.  It is not completely in my hands, so I must wait a bit.  I know that I sound very mysterious.  It is just that I am not free to discuss it, and even on a blog, the internet casts a wide net. (at least I am still able to pull out a pun here and there!)

As I am writing this, I am looking out the window at a crabapple tree in full bloom.  It is a wonderful sight.  The flowers are a magenta pink/red, and cover the tree completely.  It is about 2 weeks early than normal for it to be in bloom.  It is windy today, so I am not sure just how long the blossoms will be able to hang on before being scattered across the lawn.  I hope to get a few good photos today before that happens.  The other day, as I sat in the front room of our house, the sun had just the right angle, and there was a pink glow that came into the room.  It was magical.  I just sat there and watched as it finally disappeared as the sun moved further down toward sunset.  A few moments like that can make up for so many bad times.

We got one big project completed which is a huge weight off the shoulders.  Now we have only 100 others to try to complete-or at least make some progress in them.  My husband is as much of a procrastinator as I, together we are terrible.  I picture the tasks getting done, but on another day.  We don’t get much accomplished that way!

Yesterday evening I got a call from my uncle, the last of my dad’s family, to tell me about some major health problems he’s been having.  Major surgery, some complications, and a slow recovery.  It makes it clear that his generation may not be with us much longer.  He and my mom are my only blood relations from that generation.  It is so sad to realize that.

My brother-in-law talked to my husband yesterday.  He is having a very hard time being a single parent to my nephew.  My sister did almost all of the parenting.  My nephew has some special needs, he is diagnosed with ADD, but my personal diagnosis would include  Aspberger’s.  He is 14, but is functioning closer to a 10 year-old’s level.  My brother-in-law is considering dating already.  It is less than 3 months since my sister’s death.  In that time, he has cleaned out almost everything of hers…clothing, jewelry, projects, music, all of her email, has deleted her phone/message.  I don’t know why that bothers me so much, but it does.  It actually hurts me.  I feel as though he was ready to get rid of her too fast.  But then I have to remember that he is military,, and that “get ‘er done” mentality is part of his personality.  It isn’t personal. He lost his dad when he was 14, though, and I would think that would have made him a bit more sensitive of how it might look to his son to see everything of his mom disappear. And I have no control over any of it.

I would like to visit my mom on Mother’s day.  The plane ticket cost is prohibitive, so I can’t do that.  I am concerned, as my brother-in-law reports that several times when he has visited, he has found her in her apartment, in the dark, with the drapes pulled, and looking quiet disheveled.  When I talk to her on the phone, however, she seems pretty good.  She tells me that she is doing more things,  She says that she is getting to know more people.  I think  she is trying to reassure me that she is okay, but she is not.  My sister is going to visit her over Memorial Day weekend,  I hope that she can figure out the truth.  We will be with her for about a week in June.  I know that my mom is looking forward to that.  It was the one thing that she said she wanted to do this year when we discussed goals for the year at New Year’s.  Of course, that was before my sister’s death.  Grief changes everything.

Well, that is enough of this meandering through my brain.  It must be a scary process for others to read.



  1. Ditto on Arizona and on our latest candidate for governor. You are dreaming of moving away from Minnesota, I am dreaming of leaving the country! I love watching House Hunters International as it gives me new ideas of places I might like to go.

    My father took up with another woman almost immediately after my mother’s funeral, something I found hard to take, it was as if my mother was nothing special, yet he never re-married nor did he ever put away her things in the four years he outlived her. After awhile her things became like a ghostly presence or something, which made it harder to visit. I suppose there is some medium point, too soon, too long, but I couldn’t say where that point is. When my father died I took some of my mother’s things, but having them in my home doesn’t give me an eerie feeling, they instead have a new life, new vitality. I enjoy having them here.

    My youngest son has Asberger’s; I’ve been single parenting him for 10 years. My ex is military, too, which I think that keeps him clueless on how to deal with Asberber’s. He thinks he can bark orders and our kid will jump, only all my ex does with that mentality is butt heads with a kid who will not budge, no matter what. My ex gave up trying to be dad to our sons long ago; he prefers to just be their pal. Whatever. Tough to single parent my son, but he has made huge strides; he’s 15 now and right with his grade level socially and mentally. He spent one summer at Jewish camp in a program for kids with Asbergers and they did such a great job helping him learn social skills that since then he has gone to regular Jewish camp, 8 weeks in a cabin filled with noisy boys and he’s fine! It was a long road to get here and some days we go backward again, but I never give up.

    I will hope that if your BIL is more interested in the hunt for a new honey than in taking care of his son that somehow he will find a woman who doesn’t have kids of her own, will never have kids of her own, who will devote herself to helping your nephew. It’s tough; I don’t blame your BIL if he wants to escape, I would have liked the chance to escape now and then as well! I cried many tears over my son, but then got back up and carried on. From what I’ve seen, most men are not so strong.

    Not scary to read. Just normal.

  2. What is happening in Arizona is scary.
    The fact that so many endorse it, is even scarier.
    We need work permits for those who want to come here for work and then are able to go back home.
    Many crossing the border are doing jobs that those here don’t want to do.
    Lets see what happens if there is no one to pick those apples and tomatoes get to 10.00 a lb.

  3. Most people in America aren’t against immigration; they’re just against illegal immigration. For example, like most of our ancestors, my mother’s parents were immigrants. They came through Ellis Island and followed the various legal steps required in order to establish themselves as true citizens of this country. The immigrants crossing the Mexican border, however, have absolutely no interest in following these legal protocols. Once they cross the border, they change their names and/or purchase social security numbers in an effort to conceal their true identities from the law. It is not uncommon for an illegal immigrant to purchase not one, but two or more social security numbers, just in case one is flagged. I have witnessed this crime with my own eyes. (One day, a supposedly legal immigrant was asked to give their social security card to a receptionist for a job application and an interview. When the receptionist happened to ask to see the card a second time, the immigrant mistakenly handed over a different social security card with the same name on it, but with a completely different set of numbers…)

    Don’t get me wrong: I’m not against Hispanics. I have many Hispanic friends, but they either have green cards to work in the United States or have become legal citizens. They decided to follow the rule of law and work within the boundaries of our legal system. Unfortunately, many immigrants do not, and it is those particular individuals that we are most concerned about.

    Now it seems that those who sympathize with illegal immigrants wish to hijack the discussion of reform by attacking the law recently imposed by the State of Arizona through protests and boycotts; a state mind you, that has been besieged with crime, drugs and an ever-increasing population of illegal immigrants. Don’t allow them this option. Speak out and take action. This is your country… fight for it.

    In closing, I consider myself to be a bleeding-heart liberal: a Democrat. My ancestor, Roger Williams – the founder of Rhode Island and founder of the First Baptist Church in America, was one too; regarding the acceptance of different nationalities, cultures and religions as the vitality and lifeblood of any country. Nevertheless, I think that he would agree with me; that immigrants wishing to become legal citizens have not only the obligation, but the civil and legal responsibility to follow the rules of law established by any country in which they wish to become authentic citizens, just as our ancestors – both yours and mine – struggled so arduously and righteously to achieve.

    • While I cannot claim to know what it is like to live in Arizona, I do know what it is like to live in America. In America, we have a Constitution that we are to follow. This law does not follow that Constitution, no matter how you read it. I refuse to allow the anger and fear of some in our country to justify the dismantling of our Constitution. This law is not the appropriate way to handle the stated problem.

  4. There are now rumblings here in Texas that our own Legislature wants to do a law like the idiot law in Arizona…… Makes me want to go screaming back to the more Liberal Safety of Oregon where a law like that would NEVER happen.

    I am white but have a Ukranian name. I sure hope I don’t get pulled over and have to go to Jail because I cannot prove that I am here legally…..other than my Drivers License….which practically everyone can easily get these days.

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