When I was your age…………..

There have been several things that have caught my attention lately which have emphasized ways that the world has changed since I was a young person.  Some are from work, a couple are from my personal life.

My husband’s niece is getting married next May. One of my son’s best friends is getting married next May. On the same day. We were told about the date by my brother-and sister-in-law last March, I believe. They had been dating a few months, and got engaged, with a year until the wedding date.

There are two things centered around these weddings that point to how different things are from when I got married.  The niece and her fiance have started a wedding website. We were sent a link to the website by my sister-in-law. There are photos and bios for each member of the wedding party.  Never seen that before. There are photos and bios for the ring bearer and flower girl. Four of the five women in the wedding party are named Megan, although with some variations in the spelling of the name. No one on our side of the family is in the wedding, not even the bride’s two brothers.

The friends have sent out a “save the date” pre-invitation to the wedding. It is actually pretty cute, on a strip of photos from a photo booth, with the two of them holding signs saying “save the date, May 7, 2011”.  I guess we can expect to receive an official invitation sometime in the future. Never heard of that before.

When I was at work today, I was with a kid who is charged with assaulting another kid in a parking lot of a local convenience store. The police reports indicate he walked up to the kid and punched him a couple of times, knocking him to the ground and kicking him in the ribs while he was on the ground.  I was talking to him and his parents. He pretty clearly took responsibility. But his dad was ticked off because he claims that his son was being subjected to bullying by the alleged victim. He stated to me in front of his son. “He got what was coming to him, I think my son did the right thing.” This is a first for me. In the 16 years I have represented kids, no parent has been this proud of his kid for assaulting someone. Not to this extent. They may have understood it, and realized why their child did it, but they almost always say that their kid needs to be responsible for his own actions. This is a middle class younger than middle age father. The kid has not been in trouble before this. This is the attitude that many parents had in the 1950’s when it was considered a rite of manhood to fight someone. I told the dad straight out that a judge will not agree with his assessment. I am not sure that he understood.

My son has other friends who are due to have a baby in December. My son and daughter-in-law are hosting a couples baby shower for them. The parents to be are registered at a baby store, locally owned, and sort of “earthy” if you know what I mean. The future parents had requested that the invitations include not only the name of the store where they are registered, but a list of charities where they would prefer donations to baby gifts. My daughter-in-law did not include the charity information. Even she had not heard of that, and felt uncomfortable including it in the invitation. I’ve never heard of it either.

There were several people talking at work the other day. I am old enough to be the parent of most of them. When I made a comment that I have a facebook account, they were shocked that someone my age was on facebook.

The world is changing every day.  I am constantly learning of something new. I try to keep up. When I do, it apparently is shocking to the young ‘uns. 

When I was your age, I respected my elders!

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