Giving myself a little gift this holiday season

Last year at this time, I was really down. My first Christmas after my sister’s death was very difficult. She was the person in the family who would pack up a huge box of gifts for everyone in the family, every one of them beautifully gift wrapped, and have it sent off at least two weeks before Christmas. There was always excitement in the house when we opened the box of gifts she sent.

So last year, there was no box.

It was very depressing.

This year, I have tried very hard to take on a different attitude. I have struggled with it, and on some days I am more successful than others. The fact that we have no snow, have had unusually warm weather and that my daughter won’t be able to be here until after the holidays makes it harder to get excited about the holidays.

But I have found a secret which has helped. A lot.

I have figured out very special gifts for several people in the family.

These are gifts that they do not expect. They have not asked for them.  They are gifts that will have special meaning to all of them. I cannot say what these gifts are, as I have a suspicion that some family members read this blog. I will not be able to reveal the specifics of the gifts until after the holidays.

But the mere idea of providing family members with very special gifts has made my mood much more positive. I am very excited for them to open the gifts. I want to see their faces when the gifts are opened. It is as though these items are a gift to myself-the gift of joy in making others happy.

The only drawback to this plan is that I am getting very anxious for Christmas.  I don’t think I’ve felt this way since I was a little kid.

Believe me, I am not bubbly or giddy, that is just not me. But for me, I am feeling good about this year’s gift exchange.

Happy Holidays to me!

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