Posted by: chlost | October 14, 2013

Launching is often a long-term process

 

Society Finches

Society Finches (Photo credit: dog.happy.art)

I’m not sure why, exactly, but I feel compelled to at least post a brief summary of the huge changes happening in this little word of mine.

My son and daughter and law have decided to stay together. They have each taken a hard look at the issues in their relationship, and they decided that they want to do all that they can to make their marriage work.

As a parent, I am very proud of them

Then…..

Our son lost his job. He was the primary breadwinner. All benefits, such as insurance for the family disappear with that job.

He realized that the long hours of the job, as well as the exhaustion of working weekends and nights, kept him from being a fully involved member of the family. He was not being the father that he wants to be. He was not the husband that he wants to be. They had big financial struggles even before this. (Student loans are going to keep an entire generation from being financially stable, btw)

He is looking for a job. But not just any job. He wants something that he can feel passionate about and that will allow him to maintain his priority of his family. We’ll see. I definitely raised an idealist.

Long story short…..they have to move.

Short short story…..they are moving in with us. The five of them. And their cat.

We are very happy that we have a house that will allow them to do this. But we are sort of set in our ways, just the two of us. It will be a big change to our lives. And theirs.

It’s also very exciting. We are looking forward to having them around.

We are a little apprehensive about having them around.

The kids have to change schools. They are sad about that. But they are also excited to live with us.

We thought that it would happen the first weekend of November. Tonight we learned that they have to be out of their place October 25th. In a week and a half. It is going to be chaos around here for the foreseeable future. They will be with us for a year, possibly two.

Anyone have a quiet spare room that could occasionally house a guest? I’d pay.

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Responses

  1. Wow! What times we live in. I think this kind of thing is fairly common nowadays – the grown up kids needing to move back for one reason or another, mostly financial. Not easy for any of you but what a wonderful opportunity to spend lots of time with the grandchildren. Best wishes to you all:)

  2. It is great that your son and his wife are making the attempt to re-establish their relationship, and that your son wants to be a more involved member of the family.

    And, moving in with you … that seems to be a sign of the times we’re living in. In a sense, it seems to be a return to a past era, when families lived together, parents, children, grandchildren … it’ll be crowded, it’ll be a change … but, in the end, the opportunity for many wonderful memories should make it worth it.

    And, if you need a room … we’ve got one … 🙂

  3. I’m glad you are able to be there to help out your son and his family. It will certainly be an adjustment. I remember as a child, we had to live with my grandparents for a while until my parents had a house. Sure, ti can get crowded, but on the plus side, it’s nice that your grandchildren will have more time with you. Good luck with the changes!

  4. My grandparents moved in with us when age and illness became problems. It was not easy for my mother but she was a nurse and managed very well! This was WWII time and she was called back to work because of the shortage of nurses. We made it and you will too!

  5. Not an easy situation . . . they are so lucky to have you!

  6. Things are different in these modern times, but you seem to be doing pretty well, considering. I wonder how it is that health care for anyone is tied into someone’s job? no wonder millions are without.

  7. From empty nest to busting at the seams. It is frightening how many of us are just a paycheck away from financial disaster. I feel like we’ve lived like this our whole life. My best wishes for a transition that will certainly bring laughter and tears! And we have a whole third floor that is not in use until school vacations!!!

  8. My goodness. This is going to be tough, indeed, but my gut is saying that it’s a glory that you are able to give your son and his family a chance to reconfigure their lives so that they all are ultimately happier. The transition, of course, could be exhausting.

    I wish we had an extra room; you’d be more than welcome.

    I congratulate you on your generosity of heart. Well done.

    Oh, and thank you for the wonderful comment on my Mean Girls post; you’re very wise, indeed.

  9. Wow – you’re not kidding that it will be an adjustment! I hope it goes well!


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