Posted by: chlost | January 1, 2014

Back

It’s been quite awhile now. I knew that I was taking a break from the blog world, but hadn’t anticipated it to be this long. My whole 5 reader audience has, I am sure, been devastated by my absence.

There have been many changes in my world over the last few months. Many happy moments, even more disappointing ones. Our lives are now quite different, and things are still unsettled as to the future.

One lesson that I have learned: Although your child may deeply disappoint you, your love for him continues. Our son’s recent actions have surprised, disappointed, hurt, and confused us. Yet he is our son. A well-loved son. Merle and I have struggled, wondering how our parenting may have contributed to the situation. But then we realized that these were his actions, not ours. He wrote me a letter at Christmas thanking me for my strength through all of the recent hardships, and acknowledging his mistakes. The letter made me cry.

So much for strength.

He lost his job. His family lost their primary income. His wife nearly left him. But they have decided, at least at this point, to try to stay in their marriage. They are now living with us. We are very thankful that we are in a position to be able to be of assistance. We love having all of them (our 3 granddaughters also live with us now!) here. It is a full, busy, noisy house again. This is the way this house was meant to be.

Our daughter was married in August in our favorite spot-Glacier Park, Montana. Along the shore of Lake McDonald, on a sunny, cool morning, they had their ceremony. It was gorgeous. It was “them”. Most of their guests were friends who had traveled from all over the country and camped and hiked and partied together for the preceding week.

Our oldest son has recently become engaged, and they plan to marry in August. This time the wedding will be much closer to home. It will be almost as opposite from last summer’s wedding as is possible. Bigger, fancier, much more extravagant. I am sure it will be perfect as well.

Family activities and issues have consumed most of my time, energy-and to be frank, money. I truly hope to carve out a bit more “me” time over the next several months. Time which may be used toward blogging, reading, or traveling.

I really want to travel. Just a bit. Not far. Not for long.

Lately the urge to just get in the car and drive has been getting quite strong. Preferably in a southerly direction, as it has been a horribly cold winter here.

I’m open to suggestions.

 

 

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Responses

  1. Happy 2o14 to you and yours … may it be a year of wonderful things for you and your family!

    • Thank you. Wishing you a year of good things as well.

  2. Sounds as though you are coping well. How great that you are able to help your family out, even though you might need a few weeks in a padded room before it’s all over. Good luck to you and I hope 2014 will be a happier year.

    • Things are going pretty well. As long as it was a quiet padded room, it might be nice for a little break once in a while!.Best wishes to you for 2014, as well.

  3. You’ve got a lot going on, but I do hope you do find the time for yourself. Everyone needs that. I also hope you do get the little vacation that you need. People love to come to Phoenix in the winter since the winters are so mild. It’s kind of far from where you are, though 🙂

    • I spent some time in Phoenix during the winter several years ago. It was nice. It was only a 20+ hour drive, which we did straight through with the 3 kids. Fun trip.

  4. Not devastated, but concerned. South sounds like a real good direction at this time.

    • It feels nice to have someone out there concerned. Appreciate that. Wanna take a trip south? Jocelyn can pick you up on the way down here, and we can just keep going.

  5. Actually, I was pleased to see you pop back up.

    I hope things look up for your son and his family.

    • Aw, thanks! I’ve been encouraging both my son and dil to get into counseling. They will soon have had 2 marital sessions and each will have had a couple sessions individually. I think that there is hope for them to grow back into their relationship with this help, if that is what they decide that they wish to do.

  6. I’d like to say “drive towards me!”–but that wouldn’t help with your Cold As Hell issues at all.

    What you write about coming to terms with your son’s choices and behaviors is honest and thoughtful. I agree that they are HIS to own, not yours to trace back to you. And how very lovely and fortunate that you can open your home to them without going (too) crazy!

    Congratulations on the other weddings and the expansion of your family.

    Btw, I’m posting from my Facebook account (first time I’ve ever done that on a blog), having just spent ten minutes trying, unsuccessfully, to post from Google. ARghghghghghgh.

    • In fact, driving toward you and your fun-filled world would probably quite warming.
      Thanks for the support.
      BTW, if you are uncomfortable with how the fb comment format shows up here, let me know and I can delete it.


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